Last week in Mexico City, I caught myself rereading the same Slack thread three times. Nothing was wrong with the words. My brain just wouldn’t lock in. I had a long day of shipping, a late investor call, and family stuff in the background. Add the quiet pressure of a big personal goal (I want to build a life in Spain), and my body was acting like it was in a constant “brace for impact” mode.
That’s stress in plain words: your mind and body on high alert, even when you’re sitting at a desk.
This post is my simple, practical stress-relief plan for founder life. It’s built for meetings, code reviews, hiring calls, and runway math. It’s not medical advice. If stress feels unmanageable, or you feel unsafe, professional help is a strong move, not a weakness.
Know what kind of stress you have (so you can fix the right thing)
When I’m stressed, my first instinct is to “work harder” and hope the feeling goes away. That’s like seeing a CPU spike and guessing the cause without checking logs. It wastes time.
I try to label my stress in 60 seconds so I stop guessing. In startup terms, the triggers are predictable: deadlines, shipping risk, hiring, churn, burn rate, and constant context switching.
Acute vs. chronic stress, and why chronic stress steals your focus
Acute stress is short and sharp. It’s the minutes before a demo, the hour after prod breaks, or the day you realize a key candidate is ghosting.
Acute stress can be useful. It can push you to act. Your body ramps up energy, attention, and speed.
Chronic stress is different. It’s when the alert state becomes your default. You wake up already tense. You’re “on” all day, then you carry it into the night. Chronic stress steals focus because your brain keeps scanning for threats, even when the task is simple.
In founder life, chronic stress often shows up like this:
- Tight jaw, neck, or shoulders
- Shallow breathing (almost like you’re bracing)
- Doom-scrolling as a fake “break”
- Snapping in Slack, or going cold and silent
- Brain fog, headaches, stomach issues
- Sleep trouble (either can’t fall asleep, or you wake up wired)
The cost isn’t just mood. It’s decision quality. You ship slower, make more mistakes, and lose patience with people you actually like.
My quick stress check: body signals, thoughts, and habits
Here’s the check I run when I feel “off.” It takes one minute, and it’s boring on purpose.
Body signals
- Where am I tense right now (jaw, shoulders, stomach)?
- Is my heart rate up for no reason?
- Am I breathing high in my chest?
Thoughts
- Are my thoughts racing, or looping?
- Am I telling myself a worst-case story?
- Am I treating a problem as a disaster?
Habits
- Did I spike caffeine without food?
- Did I skip a real meal?
- Did I work late the last two nights?
Then I rate my stress from 1 to 10 and write the number down. I track it across the week, not to judge myself, but to spot patterns. If every Tuesday is an 8, it’s not “random,” it’s a system bug.
If your stress feels more like constant worry than pressure, this guide can help you separate signals and decide next steps: Anxiety quiz guide and next steps
Fast stress relief you can do in 5 minutes between calls
I used to think stress relief required a full workout, a perfect morning routine, or an empty calendar. That’s not founder reality.
I aim for calm, not perfection. These are tools I can run in a coworking space, at home, or right before a pitch. The goal is to change my state fast, then return to work with a steadier hand.
Breathing that actually lowers stress fast (box breathing and longer exhales)
When stress hits, my breathing gets short and fast. That tells my nervous system, “We’re in danger.” The simplest fix is to reverse the signal.
Longer exhales help because they nudge the body toward a calmer mode. You’re not “thinking” your way out, you’re changing inputs.
Two options I use:
Option A: Box breathing (3 rounds)
- Inhale 4 seconds
- Hold 4 seconds
- Exhale 4 seconds
- Hold 4 seconds
Repeat for 3 rounds.
Option B: Longer exhale (2 minutes)
- Inhale 4 seconds
- Exhale 6 seconds
Repeat for 2 minutes.
Small tips that make this usable in real life:
- Put your feet flat on the floor.
- Drop your shoulders on every exhale.
- On Zoom, I go mic off for 60 seconds. No one needs to know.
If you want a team-ready version you can roll out without making it weird, this is solid: Stress-relief breathing micro-break program for teams
A 3-step reset for your nervous system: move, release, sip water
Stress loads the body like a spring. If you never let it release, it stays tight. Movement is the fastest “pressure valve” I know.
My mini protocol is simple:
- Move (60 seconds): brisk walk, stairs, or pacing while you read notes.
- Release (30 seconds): shoulder rolls, unclench jaw, relax your tongue off the roof of your mouth.
- Sip water (20 seconds): slow sips, not chugging.
If you’re in a tiny space, this still works:
- 10 wall push-ups
- 10 squats
- 20 calf raises
It’s not about fitness. It’s about telling your body, “We can burn off this signal, we don’t need to hold it.”
Stop the spiral with a one-page brain dump and a next action
When my stress is mental, it usually means my task queue is running in my head, with no scheduler.
I grab a sheet of paper (or a single note) and split it into two columns:
Left: “What’s stressing me”
I write the raw list. No editing.
Right: “What I can do today”
For each item, I write one action.
The rule that matters: pick one next action that takes 10 minutes or less. Examples:
- Send the message to unblock someone
- Write a doc outline with the decision points
- Schedule the hard talk for tomorrow
- Open the PR and leave the first comment
Clarity is stress relief. Not because the problem disappears, but because your brain stops treating it like an undefined threat.
Use your senses to ground fast (5-4-3-2-1 in real life)
When stress starts to feel like panic, my attention collapses into one point. Everything becomes “the problem.” Grounding widens the frame.
I use 5-4-3-2-1 like a checklist:
- 5 things I can see
- 4 things I can feel (chair, feet in shoes, phone in hand)
- 3 things I can hear
- 2 things I can smell
- 1 thing I can taste (or imagine tasting)
Founder use cases where this helps:
- Right before a demo, when your hands get cold
- After a tough customer call, when you feel heat in your face
- When you get bad news and your brain goes blank
It’s simple, and that’s the point. In a spike, simple is stable.
Daily habits that make stress relief easier (especially for founders)
Fast tools help, but prevention is cheaper. I think of this like reducing error rates in production. If you lower baseline stress, incidents still happen, but they don’t take you out for a full day.
I focus on sleep, caffeine, food, light movement, boundaries, and work design. Not because it’s “wellness,” but because it protects energy and judgment.
Sleep basics that work even when you’re busy
I’m not perfect here. Late launches happen. Travel happens. Sometimes I’m calling Spain at odd hours from Mexico City, and it stretches the day.
What works best for me is a small, repeatable plan:
- Consistent wake time most days (even if bedtime shifts)
- Screen down 30 to 60 minutes before sleep (or at least dim and stop scrolling)
- Caffeine cutoff around 8 hours before sleep, if I can
- Wind-down that doesn’t require motivation: shower, a few pages of a book, light stretching
After a late night, my reset rule is: don’t punish myself. I still get up close to normal time, take sunlight early, and aim for an earlier bedtime. One rough night is a blip. The spiral starts when I try to “fix it” with chaos.
Stress-friendly fuel: caffeine, food, and hydration without perfection
Caffeine can feel like a solution, until it becomes the problem. Stress raises tension, then caffeine adds more. Now you’re jittery, hungry, and impatient, and you call it “focus.”
Simple rules I follow:
- Eat protein early, even if it’s small.
- Don’t skip lunch. A “working lunch” is fine, but eat.
- Pair coffee with food.
- Drink a glass of water each time you caffeinate.
Two common stress multipliers I watch:
- Alcohol when I’m already wired (it can wreck sleep depth)
- Late sugar spikes (the crash can feel like anxiety)
I’m not chasing a perfect diet. I’m trying to avoid avoidable spikes.
Build a calmer workday with two blocks: deep work and admin
Context switching is a stress generator. It fragments attention, then your brain tries to stitch it back together at night.
A structure that works for me:
- One protected deep-work block (60 to 120 minutes): building, writing, designing, debugging
- One admin block (30 to 60 minutes): Slack, email, scheduling, small decisions
- Micro-breaks every 60 to 90 minutes: stand up, breathe, water
My meeting rule: no meeting stacks without a 5-minute reset. If I don’t insert that buffer, I carry the last call into the next one, like a memory leak.
Set boundaries that don’t hurt your company (message rules and off-hours)
Boundaries sound soft until you realize they protect response quality. I’ve sent bad messages when I was tired and stressed. That’s expensive.
I set expectations with simple scripts:
- “I check Slack at 11 and 5. If it’s urgent, text me.”
- “After 7 pm Mexico City time, I’m offline unless prod is down.”
- “Let’s define urgent: revenue risk today, security, or a blocked launch.”
Time zones add pressure. Mexico City to Spain can pull your day in both directions. I try to pick one overlap window and defend it. If everything is always available, nothing is protected, including your brain.
Long-term stress relief: fix the source, not only the symptoms
Tools are great. Habits are better. But the real win is upstream: change what creates the stress load.
Some stress is part of the job. Some is optional, caused by unclear scopes, too many priorities, or isolation.
Do a weekly stress review: what to drop, delegate, or delay
Once a week, I do a short review. It’s like sprint planning, but for my nervous system.
My template:
- Top 3 stressors this week
- What I control, what I don’t
- What I can cut
- What I can delegate
- Who can help
- One commitment for next week
This is where I spot patterns like “too many half-started projects” or “I’m doing tasks a good ops person could do faster.” Delegation isn’t just scale, it’s stress relief.
Talk it out: co-founder stress, investor pressure, and isolation
Founder stress gets louder when you’re alone with it. Even with a team, it can feel like you’re carrying the final responsibility for everything.
I try to keep a small support system:
- One peer founder who gets it
- One mentor who can zoom out
- One therapist or coach if stress starts to stick
For hard conversations, I use a simple structure:
- Name the issue in one sentence.
- Propose a next step.
- Set a follow-up date.
Example: “I’m feeling overloaded by on-call plus roadmap. I want us to rotate and cut one project. Can we decide by Friday?” Clear, calm, and time-bound.
When stress becomes too much: signs to get professional support
Some signs mean it’s time to stop self-managing and get help:
- Panic attacks
- Constant insomnia for weeks
- Heavy drinking or using substances to cope
- Hopeless thoughts
- You can’t function at work or at home
- Anger that scares you
- Chest pain or breathing problems
Talk to a doctor or a licensed therapist. If you or someone else is in danger, seek emergency help right now. That’s not dramatic, it’s responsible.
Conclusion
I still get stressed, and I’m sure I will again, but I don’t have to stay stuck there. My plan is simple: label the stress, use a 5-minute tool, build daily habits that lower baseline load, then review weekly to fix the source. Pick one quick technique to try today (breathing or the move-release-water reset), then schedule one small habit for this week. The goal isn’t to feel calm all the time, it’s to recover faster and protect your focus when it matters.